drama mama

I finally realized what my problem is: I take myself WAY too seriously.

I've made my life out to be like some damn Felicity or Dawson's Creek episode only with less attractive people who don't employ the vocabulary of literatis in their everyday speech. An episode of Suzy's Life would go something more like this:

Suzanne's apartment on a cold, windy Washington night. Matt, his clothes drenched and his hair matted to his forehead dripping with rain, bangs on the door impatiently. Suzanne immediately recognizes the sound of his rainboots sloshing around the threshold, and hesitantly turns the knob, only to meet Matt's furious, flushed face two inches from her own, with what appear to be tiny tears in the corners of his eyes.

Suzanne: Darling, what ever is the matter? Come in, come in! Before you catch a fever!

Matt: I can only stay for a moment, Suzanne, just for a moment.

He puts his heads in his head and begins to sob uncontrollably, as Suzanne grasps his shoulders:

Suzanne: Please, tell me what's wrong! Did one of your coworkers demean your masculinity? Did you hit a small forest animal along the road? Are you experiencing a quarter-life crisis?

Matt (turning so that his back faces her): No, no! Nothing like that (He glares at her) It is far...worse...

Suzanne (sighing): Oh no! What could it be?

Matt (spinning around to look her in the eye): It is...you. You have betrayed me. (He pauses to let out another sorrowful moan). I saw you with that man in Old Town, ohh you say you innocently met him in a Starbucks- he had mistakenly picked up your latte with skim milk when he had ordered whole- but I knew when you mentioned him that it was more than just low fat dairy you were interested in. You wanted his mind, his body.

Suzanne (in desperation): No! I swear, it was only the gelato! I let him take me out for gelato! You know my weakness for anything Italian.

Matt (hissing): Yes...his name is Antonio.



Ok so in reality my love life isn't quite that dramatic but I guess in my little head they just become that way. I suppose I do enjoy romanticizing. And besides, if I could write a script to my life, it probably would look more like an exciting primetime show with cliff hangers and affairs, even if I did end up looking like prima donna. Heck, if we didn't like drama, why in the world we watch those shows anyway?